One step forward, Two Steps back

namixiii:

rokuxiii:

“I could help!” He sort of shouted urgently, “I mean…you also could stay at least one more night. It’s late and I’m not going to kick you out right away.” He coughed and tried to gain back his calm composure.

The guilt inside him was lethal. Technically, in a sense, they did break up. Though honestly, he really didn’t think they were together in the first place. No, what they did was out of appreciation and tension. The problem was, they were releasing it the wrong way. It just didn’t feel right to be so delusional in the first place, not when he could do things better. To make Namine see the world and open up, that’s what he wanted. She was still quiet, still reserved, and he knew there was so much more underneath it all. 

“We can move you into the mansion tomorrow.” He soon concluded carefully while following her, “But if you want, I can help you pack.”

His voice was still heard able, she knew he was following her into the bedroom.  She smiled lightly from him offering to help her and even stay another night but she knew she wouldn’t be able to stand it.  In a way she was sad, she waited days for Roxas to come back home and now she had to be the one leaving.  The past nights were horrible since she didn’t knew if he was okay or not and now she had to get used to the idea that they weren’t going to sleep together anymore.  If she only stayed one more night, it would torn her apart to know that what she had now was difficult to get back. 

“I rather leave tonight…” She began to explain, without daring to look at him, afraid that her expression would say more then her words.  “I don’t have that many stuff… I can do it alone.  Thanks for offering though.”  She only said as she continue to take off her few clothe and put them inside a bag. “Is getting late anyway, you should probably get ready to sleep.”

He frowned from her response, “Oh…okay…” He walked over and touched her hand though, “You can yell at me if you want…hit me even…”

Even if she wasn’t saying anything, he knew deep down she was hurting. He didn’t need anything to prove that. Her very presence and aura was trembling in being near him. He honestly couldn’t understand how she could even want to meet a guy like him. The worse part was the deep pride and desire to have her stay because he didn’t want to be alone. However, that was a selfish desire in itself, and he knew that. There was no way he could be such a jerk to make her stay after being the one who suggested to kick her out. Well, not like he was, but it might as well felt that way to her. One thing was for sure, he was not going to let her go on her own. 

“You got to be upset about something, Namine.” It was like he was begging her to stop acting like nothing bothered her, “I mean…how can you not?” 

He was getting tired of this barrier she constantly surrounded herself in. It was like she was afraid to expose herself over something he knew she didn’t want to risk losing.